“Grown-up people do not know that a child can give exceedingly good advice even in the most difficult case.” 

 Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Idiot


A year or two ago I was in St Petersburg for an industry exhibition. I searched the guidebook for an interesting, non-business restaurant not too far from my hotel. We were with an vegetarian colleague so there needed to be a good selection for him to choose from too. I came up with The Idiot – after the eponymous book by Dostoyevsky part of which I understood had been written on the premises. It’s a wonderfully eccentric place, stuffed with bric-a-brac and dusty-looking oil painting, and with backgammon, checker and chess sets provided, all to a background of jazz. And as they say endearingly on their website, “we are happy to provide you quality service and english-speaking stuff.”

Eating at The Idiot includes a complimentary shot of vodka, but if you were feeling a bit more adventurous you could set yourself up for these mushrooms with their Crime and Punishment cocktail – as they describe it – “Crime (ours) and Punishment (for you) – Vodka, Martini, Cognac, Champagne”

These mushrooms go well with a sausage cake.


mushrooms with cream recipe

If you arrange the mushrooms carefully this dish looks impressive

For four as an accompaniment – or you can make in four individual oven-proof ramekins and serve as a starter


  • 600g/1 lb 4 oz Portabella mushrooms
  • 1 leek (this is optional)
  • 120ml/½ cup double cream
  • 55g/2 oz/¼ cup grated cheddar
  • Smoked salt, Indonesian long pepper
  • A few grinds of nutmeg (if you are having trouble with your nutmeg grater go here to find a good one)
  • Walnut of butter for frying


  1. Preheat the oven to 210°C (use the top right aga oven)
  2. Take off the tough outer leaves of the leek and slice about half of the white section very finely – throw away the rest or use it for stock
  3. Put a knob of butter into a frying pan and begin frying the leeks gently
  4. Peel and roughly slice the mushrooms
  5. Fry the mushrooms
  6. Take out the mixture and arrange artistically in a shallow dish – a quiche dish is ideal
  7. Season generously
  8. Mix most of the cream, grated cheese and nutmeg together and pour over the mushrooms – if it looks moist enough don’t add more cream but otherwise add the rest. Sometimes the mushrooms produce a lot of liquid of their own – you need to take that into account.
  9. Put in the oven for about a quarter of an hour – don’t let it burn so, especially if you have an aga, keep a watch on it.


This post is dedicated to Jonathan Parr, with apologies for booking him into a cupboard complete with red light in St Petersburg


mushrooms in cream recipe

You’d be an idiot not to….


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